Dear Ivy,

Why does my ex-boyfriend still talk to me if he doesn't want to date me? He's broken up with me twice already yet still talks to me a couple times a week. Should I move on? Should I not?

-Confused and Single


Dear Confused and Single,

He’s doing the most natural thing men do—being possessive. You know why? Because he can. You are letting this happen. The solution is simple. Cut him out. That’s not to say you can’t be friends with your ex, but you need time to close up the previous chapter between the both of you can start a new one. And guess what? Him still being in the picture ensures you never get over him and hinders you from moving on. If he won’t have you, it seems no one will. Move on, if he sees how adamant you are this can go two ways, he may not be able to handle your absence and beg you to take him back or he may just stop calling.


Dear Ivy,

Call me old-fashioned, but I want to stay a virgin until I'm married. Now that I'm getting older, I feel like this might get in the way of dating. What if I'm interested in someone and he doesn't want to wait? Or should I just not be interested in him to begin with?

-Not That Prude


Dear Not That Prude,

So let’s say you are dating someone that doesn’t want to wait. That’s his problem, not yours—unless you fall madly in love with him and your virginity just becomes a detail.

The important thing is you are free to do with your body what you please. So never succumb to having sex with someone simply for the fear of losing them or because you got pressured into it. Of course all men would rather have sex then abstain and you’re probably going to be surprising a few along the way but here’s the thing, if a guy is truly into you then he’ll be willing to do accept your terms no matter what. Better yet, if he’s really the one then he’ll appreciate you saving yourself for him until your big day.

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Have a question you'd like to know the answer to? Email her at tell.ivy@gmail.com.

Why Does My Ex Still Talk to Me?
 

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