The whole notion of Instagram is seated dangerously between a thin line of actual communication and connection, and superficiality, materialism and just plain showing off. Take that, and apply it to the masters of superficiality (the Lebanese) and you get these predictable, annoying pictures on your feed that reiterate the emptiness and insecurity these people feel.
1. New Purchases
I don’t think anything gets to me as much as this one. I just don’t get it – why does the world need to know that you recently got a Michael Kors bag from your father for Christmas? Or even worse, that your boyfriend got you a diamond ring for your one-week anniversary.
The moment a Lebanese girl lands at the beach (the place for swimming, might I remind you) signifies an instantaneous update on our Instagram feed of her thighs with the beach in front of her.
5. Couple Picture with Quotes (Photo via metro.us)
Expect to see this when you refresh your feed: “#habibi, you are my life. With you, I feel real. With you, I feel whole. Thanks baby for everything and a happy anniversary to you 4ever! #<3”
Alright, I’m not trying to be a grumpy cat here, but if you love your boyfriend/girlfriend so much, it would be much more touching to get them a rose and go over to their house. Uploading a picture of you two is fine – but overdoing it with the love captions and unnecessary hearts and xoxo’s is both annoying and a sign of insecurity and self-doubt both in yourself, and your relationship.
Your relationship is about you two, remember that.
6. Sunset Pictures with Deep Captions
Embrace the sunset – enjoy it, and get lost in it. Don’t waste your time trying to get a picture of it because, really, we can all Google sunsets.
7. A Clubbing Picture
These often include the caption, “you can’t sit with us” (umm… no one wants to sit with you, honey) and a quote from Drake’s new album.
Clubbing pictures are bound to be found on your Insta feed every Monday after the cray-cray weekend. They’re usually blurry, but nevertheless uploaded because what’s the point of going clubbing if we don’t let people know we had a #great #time?
8. A Picture with Nemr Bou Nassar or Georges Khabbaz
I mean, I don’t blame you for wanting to take a picture with these hilarious fellas but it is actually kind of creepy how almost everyone has a picture with one of the two (or both).
To make us feel crappy about staying home, watching How I Met Your Mother, munching on a Mars bars and .. stalking you.
10. Nail and Hair Pictures
Ugh. Why.
11. #OTD
The sad part about this one is that it has almost become a point to wear nice outfits and hashtag your outfit of the day. This takes us back into the whole debate of how social media creates a superficial platform – tsk, tsk.
12. A Photo of Your Passport Before Traveling
Because it’s really important to show us that you’re traveling.
13. Starbucks Picture with a Frame and Several Filters
I must say, there is a lot of promotion for Starbucks by the Lebanese. Oh, and when you order hot chocolate and you’re lucky enough to have a heart in the middle? Instagram that shit.
14. A Picture of the Mosque Downtown
This one is approved – the mosque really is beautiful
15. A Picstitch of 30 Pictures with Your Best Friend
To blind people with 500 pictures and claim your never-ending love to your best friend.
