If you haven’t already melted and evaporated from the scorching heat then you’re still struggling with this apocalyptic hell breaking loose phenomenon called a “heat wave.” You’re probably overdosing on ice cream as you read this, but hang in there because it’s not that bad! Here’s the bright side of the heat wave:
1- You can easily find parking spots ANYWHERE!!! And you’ll actually have the privilege of being picky and choosing the spot that you like best! This is because you’re the only crazy badass going out in this weather.
2- You have an excuse to ditch the annoying friends you’ve been trying to avoid. “Go out today?? In this weather? Are you insane? Sorry dude, I’m out. Maybe next season.”
3- You get to play a fun game. Remember the lava floor game that you played as a kid? You had to jump on furniture to avoid the floor because it’s lava. Well this new game is the opposite, all you seek is that cold floor pressing against your skin…oh sweet Jesus!
4- You now have a new look thanks to this insane humidity! Your hair is now all frizzy whenever you dare to go out.
5- You don’t need to go to the gym or workout! The world is your sauna, all the extra pounds will just melt away…scientifically proven! No don’t look it up, just take my word for it.
6- You bond with your family. Usually there is one extra cold room in every house; this will become the new family room where everyone gathers to escape the heat. I recently had this experience and met my parents…very nice people!
7- Everyday is a beach weather kind of day!! No cloudy days, no windy days. Nope, the sun is always strongly shining….always.
8- Your mom will no longer be asking you to take out the trash or to get her some groceries, she wouldn’t want to risk her child’s health and sanity.
9- Your creativity will kick in; if the electricity goes out, you start thinking outside the box to cool yourself down. Think: living in the fridge.
Okay, who am I kidding? This is awful. Plain torture I tell you! The only bright side is that this heat wave will be coming to an end soon…hopefully. Brace yourselves my friends, stay hydrated, pay attention to your pets, set some water bowls outside if you can for all the stray animals and distribute cold water for the the homeless.
