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Joanna Aziz

Your Guide To Sarcasm In Lebanon

Ah, Beirut, city of creativity, culture, and seemingly endless sarcasm. One Lebanese person has enough sarcasm to supply material for 3 stand-up shows and then some. Their level of sarcasm is so highly developed and advanced it’s surpasses human intelligence all together. Well, not really.

For those of who us who are less knowledgeable in the humorous dialect, here are a few things Lebanese people say and what they really mean:

1. Use of the ‘smiley emoticon’

Guy: I miss you.
Girl: 🙂

Proceed with cation and at your own risk because this gleeful emoticon signals a hint of irritation and annoyance.
 
What it really means: “Whatever.”

Sarcasm Score: 6.8/10

2. Calling someone ‘Ya Zaki’ (You smart person)

Indeed this does sounds flattering to the untrained ear, however those of us skilled in the sarcastic tongue will detect the backhanded compliment.

 What it really means: “How could you be so dumb? I still like you though.”

Sarcasm Score: 3/10

3. Bakeer, (You’re early)

You’ve kept someone waiting for over an hour and that’s the first thing they say to you as soon as you arrive. 

What it really means: “You’re late for the hundredth time. I’m bored and considering leaving but I’m too hungry and low on 3G so I need to use the cafe wifi.”

Sarcasm Score: 7.3/10

4. Sada2tak, (I believe you)

You’ve rambled on for a few sentences and by the end of it there is a person staring at you with a slight smug expression and a dead look in their eyes.

 What it really means: “The chances of me believing you is as high as Donald Trump making an eligible president.”

Sarcasm Score: 8.1/10

5. Helou Zamourak (Nice car horn)

When it’s mid-day traffic and a car just blasted its horn in an endless symphony of annoyance.

What it really means: ” %&^#*!!!, how could you be so inconsiderate, I want to kill you!”

Sarcasm Score: 10/10