Listomania
Mehr Shafiei

7 Types of Parents You Find At A Typical (Fancy) Lebanese Elementary School

Back to school season is upon us, or if you want to be fancy, its time for la rentrée, as they say in Paris. Speaking of fancy, you if have a child enrolled in one Beirut’s high end elementary schools, these are seven types of parents you are sure to encounter at one point or another. Don’t say we didn’t warn you.

1. The Over-Involved Parent

This person is the quintessential micro-manager. He or she thinks they are being helpful and helping the school improve, but in fact are just annoying everyone. You can find them lounging around the administration’s offices and handing out Al Baba sweets to the teachers without occasion.

2. The Lawyer Parent

These parents take the phrase ‘devil’s advocate’ literally. Their kid has been called out by teachers for being a bully or a menace in class, yet they are up in arms and staunch allies of said kid. The problem is never the child, the problem is always the teacher in their eyes. Also, this parent wants to speak to the Manager..and it’s like, Sir – this is a school not a restaurant.

3. The Absent Father

An entire year may go by and you won’t see this ghost father figure. You know he exists on paper but there is no sign of him. Is he in Africa, Argentina, Saudi? Who knows but he never shows up to parent-teacher meetings.

4. The Ultra Strict Parent

Yii this is the one that makes all the other parents feel more liberal than a bunch of hippies living in a commune somewhere in Nevada. They have a longstanding ban on school trips.

5. And…The Ultra Lax Parent

This parent is more interested in getting the perfect tan in the French Riviera than involving themselves 1% in their kids lives. They’ll also compensate for their absence by buying little Karim or Karen every iPad under the sun.

6. The Parent By Proxy

Shoutout to all kids who are being raised by their housekeepers!

7. The Social Media Star Parent

They come to the school and take selfies with their kids to ensure they look like an involved parent to all their social media “fans.” They post unnecessary pictures of their kids lunch and caption it “brain food” or worst yet they hashtag it #supermom. Ma32oul??