Lebanese tetas are a distinct species of their own; adorable by nature and extremely hard to say no to. Here are a few points as to why tetas are so awesome! If you have any others, add them below in the comments section so we can all have a giggle!


1. “To2borne/Yo2borne” is her favourite word.



Between sentences, between words, between compliments, and probably between insults. Yo2borne tizak! You want my butt to bury you? Okay…


2. Dreams tell all…



For every dream, there is an explanation. Had your hair cut, or saw snow in a dream? Something bad is coming your way! Did you or anyone die in the dream? Wonderful! God probably extended your/their life span! Had a baby girl? Hamdella! Dreamt of a baby boy? Crap…you’d better start praying.


3. Doctor Teta



Teta is a walking commercial for 7Up. And let’s face it, boiled potatoes, laban/labne with some 7Up on the side is the cure to every single ailment under the sun. I mean, what’s the point of billions of dollars invested into medical and pharmaceutical research anyway?


4. Marriage, marriage, marriage.

Every conversation seems to begin or end with, “boukra bas tetjawaze” - as if the key to discovering the true meaning of life lays only upon my marital bed. And if the conversation doesn’t begin or end with it, it’s most probably replaced with “3a2belik” and “nefrah fike”. Just let me be, teta!


5. When I was your age (ana bi 3omrik)

You were married with 6 kids? Knew it. Thanks teta, I’d rather not!


6. When she gives you that look…



Just know you’re about to get a wad of cash more than your monthly allowance all at once in an exchange that even Pablo Escobar would envy. Also know that if your parents try to tell you off for accepting, Super Teta has your back!


7. God knows all!



It doesn’t matter what religion you are, or if you don’t have one at all. “Trekiya 3a Allah” and “metel ma Allah bi reed” are phrases you’ll hear on a daily basis.


8. The coffee cup never lies.

The coffee cup knows your destiny. Be very afraid kids! Though I’ve always wondered why my coffee cup reading always ends up with “ra7 yejeeke 3arees!”. Suspicious.


9. If you don’t eat, you WILL die.



Now let’s be honest, no teta has explicitly stated that you will die if you don’t eat, but I’m pretty sure that’s what’s going on in her head when she’s following me around the house with a sandwich throughout the day and waking me up with a farouj for breakfast with the all important cucumber on the side.


I wouldn’t trade all my tetas quirky habits for the world! After all, there’s nothing quite like being well fed and well looked after by somebody who adores you. High five to Lebanese tetas everywhere, and here’s a virtual hug from me if you’re abroad and missing yours!

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Hilarious I loved it it's so true

Mimi Saliba on Oct 19, 2016 via mobile web
 
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I love it, hilarious

Mimi Saliba on Oct 19, 2016 via mobile web
 
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Hilarious, I love it

Mimi Saliba on Oct 19, 2016 via mobile web