Blog
Ghina Al Fout

If Superheroes Were Lebanese

Note: All images were created by Omar Al Fil for Beirut.com

Superheroes were a big part of our childhood; and for some of us, they are still a big part of our lives. We took the time to ponder what it would be like if superheroes were Lebanese, and this is what we came up with:

1. Batman 




Batman is unemployed because there’s never electricity for his signal to work. The few times it does work, it’s drowned out by the ridiculous amount of pollution in the air. And you can forget about the BatMobile surviving our incredible potholes.

2. Catwoman

Lives at AUB, of course.



3. Spiderman

Spiderman and his webs get stuck in the tangled electricity and satellite cables in the city.



4. Flash

Flash is always stuck in traffic. Yes, even on the sidewalks that are not only swamped with pedestrians, but also with parked motorcycles and shop merchandise displays.




5. Superman 



Despite Clark Kent’s efforts to keep his identity a secret, the ever so bright Raja and Rodolf crack the case and exposed him as superman.




6. Iron Man

Iron Man’s suit was stolen and sold in parts for ridiculous amounts of money for people who themselves proceeded to sell them for even higher prices. You know, the Lebanese way.

7. Wonder Woman 




Wonder Woman spends her days reporting sexual harassment at makhfar hbeich, and being told to “cover up” by random people on the street.

8. Thor 



Well, Thor is basically Em R3aydi, called upon by angry Lebanese moms who want to frighten their kids into good behavior.

9. Aquaman

The Lebanese Aquaman is practically useless. With no fish and marine life left for him to communicate with, with very limited access to public beaches (since almost all public beaches are resorts now), and with the discovery that his trident from Lebanon is only adamantine-plated, this superhero would be doing what all of us do: applying for visa. Anywhere.