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Lama Hajj 10 Jul 2014

Five Conversations Every Lebanese Person Has Had

In our small society, the themes in our life can become repetitive – much like the conversations. Here are five conversations almost every Lebanese person has had or encountered.

The Help

(Image via Tumblr)

How many times have you had dinner guests compliment you on your housekeeper as if you birthed and raised her yourself? I have heard this ridiculous conversation at many dinner parties and it is almost always accompanied by stories of how well everyone treats their housekeeper. Society ladies are always so shocked that their housekeeper ran away! After all, they did let her call home TWICE this year.

The Charity

(Image via Uproxx)

What is the point of feeding orphans if you can’t go out and brag about it the next night? It is even better if you manage to Instagram some pictures of your charitable soul. You need to publicize your good deeds as much as possible, otherwise it’s like they don’t even count. Lebanese people love discussing how selfless they are, from how they cried for hours after seeing that old homeless man on the street to how they hosted hundreds of unprivileged people for dinner.

The Bomb Survival

(Image via Dogs and Doubles)

“I was JUST there…….. last Thursday.” “I had JUST turned that exact corner……. two years ago.” For some reason, everyone always seems to have just fled the bomb scene moments before it went off.

The Refugees

(Image via Plus961)

How many cars with Syrian license plates did you see yesterday? Because my mom’s friend saw like 20, you guys. This conversation is gaining popularity fast.

You’ve Lost/Gained Weight

(Image via Rap Genius)

“Yiiiii nas7aneh” (ouch) or “Yiiiii shu da3feneh” (I wish) – Either way, thank you so much for the constant update on the size of my ass, I’m so glad you’re paying close attention.