Listomania

Twenty Two Things That Only Make Sense to Beirutis

Anyone who has lived here for a while develops a communal understanding with all fellow Beirutis about the idiosyncrasies of this balad. Here are some things that could only possibly make sense to a Beiruti.

Finding Free Parking on Non-Sundays

(Image via Fun at LOL)

Oh, the joy of finding a parking spot somewhere downtown or in Hamra without having to succumb to the woes of valet-parking-money-spending.

Thinking a Trip to North Lebanon is “Exotic”

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Going to Pierre & Friends during summer and skiing in Arez during the winter make you feel a notch cooler than the people swimming at St. Georges or skiing in Faraya.

Complaining with Taxi Drivers about the “Wadi3”

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It all starts with entering an empty service, sighing at the inexplicable, horrendous traffic, and commencing with the all too ritualistic “… ekht l balad” and pondering on solutions to the seemingly never-ending troubles with a complete stranger.

Finding a Job in Beirut that Pays Well

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Let’s just say if you get a well-paying job in Beirut right after you graduate, you’re one of the lucky ones. Cheers.

Not Making a Reservation but Still Getting a Spot

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Watching a Movie Online

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When the Internet is fast enough to download a movie without any buffering, then you know LIFE IS GOOD.

Free Entrance Before 11 at Your Favorite Beach

(Image via Mashable)

This summer, it seems that beaches have a new (awesome) policy: get to the beach before eleven and you don’t pay an entrance fee. Now, if it does actually happen that you wake up before eleven and drive up all the way to the beach, you can’t help but feel like you just walked all of The Great Wall of China.

When the Byblos Festival Announces its Lineup

(Image via Happy Teacher, Happy Kids)

…and your favorite band is coming.

When Roadster or Crepaway Think You’re Ordering for the First Time and Give You Free Dessert

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Don’t lie. At some point, you’ve attempted to call from your parents’ number just for that free brownie.

Finding a Cheap Apartment in Achrafieh or Hamra

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But don’t even dream of downtown Beirut.

When Music on the Radio is Not Crap

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I don’t understand why the radio is so insistent on playing Demi Lovato and Miley Cyrus. Or, worse yet Jason Der – uloooooo. So when Lebanese radio stations decide to diversify from screeching, commercial music, it’s a lucky day.

Getting the Picture You’ve Dreamed of on the Mar Mikhael Stairs

(Image via Leabnon News)

Many people dream of that hipster-casual-but-cool photo next to the legendary colorful stairs in Mar Mikhael – #lol.

Going to Nemr Abou Nassar’s Show for the Third Time and Still Laughing at the Same Jokes

(Image via Elie Wehbe)

Whether it’s the time he almost smacked a guy on the plane, or his ex-girlfriend’s period and the trouble it brings, Nemr Abou Nassar just knows how to make us laugh.

When the Man’ouche Guy Next to your House Memorizes Your Order

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It gets tiring to have to mouth “cocktail ma3 wehde bonjus” every morning.

A Call to Charlie’s Taxi is Over in Less than a Minute

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It’s always a tad bit difficult to give directions in Lebanon (that house next to the corner of that building near the French embassy in Sodeco). And since credits don’t come cheap here, it is always a relieving feeling to know that the driver figured out where you live before one minute on the phone has passed.

When Your 3G Limit Lasts You Until the End of the Month

(Image via Bean SCDN)