Your Typical Lebanese Family… As Explained By The Little Mermaid

Lebanese families are a distinct species of their own. We all have an overprotective father, an overbearing aunt and friends that are so close that they may as well be considered blood. The Little Mermaid tells a similar tale, so tag your friends and family and let them know where they fall in this list.

1. King Triton – your typical Lebanese father

Big (we mean a keresh, not muscles), scary and demanding and you spend your teens rebelling against him, till one day when you grow up you finally realise he only had your best interests at heart and would do anything for you, including directly threatening that guy who made you cry once.

2. All 6 sisters – your one, loud-mouthed, big sister

Yup – all six of Ariel’s sisters; Aquata, Andrina, Arista, Attina, Adella and Alana. Your big sister is loud enough, chatty enough, and nosey enough to account for all six of them. However, you are super close since your mother’s constant “KHEDE EKHTIK MA3IK” remarks as a child meant you’re both partners in crime and get up to no good together.

3. Ursula – your meddling aunt

Meddling aunt, ex-boyfriend, fake friend, enemy, whatever. There is someone who’s either watching you from their balcony in the village, or FB stalking you religiously, just waiting for you to fall and trip (from the lack of pavements for pedestrians, obviously). She may not transform your tail into legs in a cunning plan to trap you, but they just can’t wait to see you crash and burn.

4. Prince Eric – your crush

Both human? Check! Unfortunately, Lebanese families are way more complicated than that. Has he got a house? And a car? What are his political affiliations? What religion is he? What does his father do? What about his reputation? Maybe Ariel had it easy after all.

5. Max, Eric’s dog

Is a dog really considered family? Absolutely. Fellas, take note – 10 extra boyfriend points for a guy with a precious pooch.

6. Flounder – your childhood friend

Your childhood friend who will try their best to steer you away from evil, but be by your side even if you do land yourself in a spot of trouble, whether you need a wasta for something, or, if the darak pulls you over at a random checkpoint. Your Flounder loves you unconditionally, even if you do make them mad at times.

7. Sebastian – your big mouthed friend

Also one of your best friends, although they can’t keep their mouth shut for long. They may not have told your parents that you’re planning on a khateefe at 16 with your dream lover, but they may accidentally slip and admit you had your nose done when you were 18. Even worse, they may also reveal the name of your beloved surgeon.

8. Scuttle – your not so bright friend

Your human version of Scuttle may know that a fork is not a “dinglehopper”, and a pipe is not a “snarfblatt”, but some questions they may ask and comments and opinions they may give have you wondering how you became friends at all.

Since it is 2017, you probably have a group chat with your Flounder, Sebastian and Scuttle which contains scruffy selfies, compromising screenshots and numerous outfit options.

9. Ariel – you!

Your locks may not be long and red (probably, frizzy and brown) but you can relate to Ariel in so many ways, even if you haven’t realised it. You’re just as adventurous, even though getting a visa is real pain, and despite your parents warnings, you may have been drawn to “Ursula” at some point and come to regret it or, just be sick of things and want a change. Even if that change just means a holiday where electricity comes on 24/7 and you don’t have to smell the ungodly stench of garbage on your way to work every day. Not switching your legs for a tail.