Listomania
Lama Hajj

Things You’ve Heard On A Date From The Guy You’ll Never See Again

We’ve all experiences PTSD curtesy of the guy who wouldn’t stop talking about his start-up. Here are things you’ve heard from the guy you went on one single date with.

1. 3am beshteghel hala2 3ala App

Please stop pretending like your app is a substitute for a personality.

2. My ex was so crazy

Was she, really?

3. B7ebb el binet el open-minded, fi kteer neiss m3a2deen

??????? Ok.

4. I haven’t taken money from my parents since I was 10

Okay, bro. Bravo.

5. Ma feeni abadan 3ala desk job

Keep your start-up pitch as far away from me as possible.

6. Kteer rta7tellik

I’m not sleeping with you.

7. I’m so glad you’re cool unlike other girls

No really, I’m not sleeping with you.

8. Insert rambling, drunken tale about how their ex cheated on them

Was it because you wouldn’t stop talking about your shitty app?

9. The best experience I ever had was when I traveled to Thailand alone

Wow sorry is this osho?

10. No way, ma b2ate3 wala nhar bala sports

That’s good for you.

11. Shabb sa7be went to Thailand and slept with a trans woman

Habibi we all know it was you.