Schedules are updated every Thursday.
No one will show you off as fiercely as your Lebanese mother does, even if she has to twist the truth a bit.
Which of these exaggerated lies has your mom told about you?
1. “Kel wlede el ouwal 3a saffon”
But in reality you even failed P.E.
2. “Ebne jeb momtaz jiddan bel terminale”
Wtf is a momtaz jiddan?
3. “Bente kel yom byet2addamla 3aris jdid”
If only that were true..
4. “Ahla lebes byelebso wlede”
Meanwhile, she criticizes your every outfit.
5. “Ana wlede 3abaqira”
Um, okay.
6. “Wlede mrabbeyin ahla terbeye”
This is just giving herself credit.
7. “Bente 3amle tobb w handase w bada tsir mohame”
Kel hol?
8. “Ebne byehke 7 loghat”
He can barely speak Arabic.
9. “Bente sarla yawmen bteshteghel deghre 3atouha promotion”
But mom, I’m unemployed.
10. “Ebne moudir sherke, kelemto bas li btemshe”
He’s an intern who makes photocopies.
11. “Kel el 3alam btehlof bi akhla2 wlede”
Lol.
12. “Wlede ma3roufin b tertibon, wen ma yrouho bikouno mzabteen halon”
Except we’re always in sweatpants.