Schedules are updated every Thursday.

Lama Hajj 13 Jul 2020

17 Of The Very Best Places To Cry In Beirut

Want an ultimate crier’s guide to Beirut? Check this out.

1. Anywhere in Horsh Beirut

300,000 square meters of winding roads and spaces = prime crying property.

2. At Bardo

Order up the shrimp red curry and act like the spice fucked you up.

3. Anywhere near #Thawra

Blame it on the teargas.

4. Chili’s

There’s no judgement at Chili’s, just nachos.

5. Anywhere in Hamra

Nobody cares about you in Hamra. Plus, chances are the sounds of your sobs will be drowned out by the sound of honks and beeps.

6. During a cooking class at KitchenLab

Slice up the onions and let your tears flow.

7. Fitness Zone

Or any other gym. The people in there grunt and groan so loudly nobody will ever notice you squealing in the corner.

8. In an Uber

Or a Careem, we don’t discriminate! Either way you can act like you’re real upset about your international spending limit taking a hit from the ride.

9. Vox Cinemas

If you’re going to cry, might as well do it in Gold.

10. At the platform of Tripoli’s Trainstation

Nobody’s catching a train anytime soon, so it’s perfectly deserted space.

11. At any local cemetery

The most cry-friendly location out there, just glance at a random grave and let those tears flow.

12. Near the back of Li Beirut

Dark and boozy. You could probably die in there and nobody would notice. Allegedly.

13. On one of the trampolines at Flyp

Nobody can see your tears if you’re jumping up and down.

14. At Bardaro

Those guys keep it pretty dark after hours! Weep in private.

15. Driving down Hazmieh Highway

Have you seen how dark those fuckers keep that highway? You can barely see other cars let alone any tears.

16. Crepaway

They told us to come as we are and now they must pay the price.

17. The bathrooms at The Grand Factory

What happens in those bathrooms, stays in those bathrooms.