Schedules are updated every Thursday.
Everyone has one of those days. You made plans a week ago with a friend you haven’t seen in years, you have to see a family member you hate, you finally accepted your ex’s invitation to coffee. But now you need to get out, you need an excuse. Try one of these on for size.
1. My passport appointment is today
Mabrouk!
2. Akalet shi mish mnee7 mbere7
You can’t expect anyone with a tummy ache to leave their house.
3. Kalbe akal shi mish mnee7 mbere7
You’ll have to handle your dog’s judging eyes but at least you can stay in the comfort of your own home.
4. Ejet el kahraba
All plans are always pending se3et el kahraba. No one can let those 30 minutes (or maybe less) go to waste. Badna neghsol, badna nethawa, etc.
5. Ra7et el may
Ejet el kahraba bas ra7et el may! If your friends say come anyway, they either truly love you or are truly disgusting.
6. Fi mashkal bel 7ay
El khodraje 3al2an ma3 sa7eb el motor w eja taba3 el dekene w fi 2was w ensa.
7. Stuck in traffic
Easiest one on the list, no one can dispute that. Make sure you take some good traffic pics you can send while you enjoy the comfort of your couch.
8. Fi azme
Hi, sorry ma fiyye eje fi azme. Azme 3a2iliye, azmet masref lebnen, azmet el kahraba? Any azme will do.
9. I had too much toum today
Completely valid. No one will question it.
10. Ana bel day3a
Bas ma 3andak day3a? Day3tak Beirut? Haye baytak mdawa sheyfak.
11. I’m stuck in line at the bank
But our plans are at 8 PM? I’m sorry I’m still in line. There’s a hostage situation.
12. I’m in line at the bakery
I thought you were at the bank?
13. I need to remain mysterious
I feel like you people are seeing too much. You know too much. It’s ruining my aura. I need to be an enigma to all of you, sorry.
14. My mom said no
The classic. Always works!