The World Just Hit 8 Billion People, And Here Are 8 Billion We Have In Lebanon
The United Nations will really make a day out of anything. Did you know that we have a World Population Day? Well, we do and don’t worry it’s not actually today. But today just so happens to be the very day that the global population hits 8 billion people, with India primed to surpass China as the world’s most populated country.
Despite the fact that we here in Lebanon are a country of a mere 6 or 7 million folk, it sure feels like we have EIGHT BILLION of these types of people:
Girls who have birthday parties with Christian Louboutin heel-shaped cakes
I’ll admit that seeing you eat a shoe is appropriate imagery.
Za3eems
Doesn’t it feel like we have 8 billion of those fuckers? We at least have 8 billion blacked out SUVs.
Food bloggers
Lebanon has 3 food bloggers per capita. “Waw kteer taybeh, 3anjad.”
Waiters who pronounce it “avocaydo”
Please.
Guys named Ahmad
There are 15 at my office alone so, I rest my case.
Political analysts
For a country with 0 political change over the last three decades, the number of these people feels excessive.
Cab drivers who used to live in Germany
“Ana betsalla 3al khatt.”
8 billion political activists who are out of touch with reality
Making their platform: “aham shi nehtamm b meshklet el noise pollution” and other secondary problems.