Beirut Report<\/a>)<\/p>\n 1. Whoa!<\/p>\n
2. That\u2019s one crowded place indeed.<\/p>\n
3. Come early to practice, they said.<\/p>\n
4. Ugh it\u2019s so hot.<\/p>\n
5. Also my visual capacity is overloaded with first generation Picantos.<\/p>\n
6. Where\u2019s my teacher?<\/p>\n
7. Wait, there\u2019s a human walking towards me.<\/p>\n
8. Harry Potter\u2019s invisibility cloak would be perfect right now.<\/p>\n
9. Oh hello there, stranger.<\/p>\n
10. [Double hair flip]<\/p>\n
11. No I don\u2019t know where the grocery shop is.<\/p>\n
12. Nor do I have tissues<\/p>\n
13. Or water.<\/p>\n
14. Or energy to keep the conversation going.<\/p>\n
15. Is that the part where I smile?<\/p>\n
16. Too late, he\u2019s already having the same conversation with the girl standing next to me (only this time he asked for water first).<\/p>\n
17. Why am I not at the beach or something?<\/p>\n
18. I feel sorry for the effort I invested in my beach body.<\/p>\n
19. Do they offer refreshments here? <\/p>\n
20. [A friendly reminder that my life plans do not include dying overheated]<\/p>\n
21. There\u2019s not even a proper place to sit.<\/p>\n
22. Hello there, self. You are going to ace your driving test.<\/p>\n
23. Today is the day you take full control of your life.<\/p>\n
24. See that parking spot over there? Your future belon\u2026<\/p>\n
25. \u201cReady for a small practice?\u201d><\/p>\n
26. Umm, oh, okay, hi. <\/p>\n
27. Did you have to murder my existential moment?<\/p>\n
28. *Starts car like a boss*<\/p>\n
29. If my teacher yells \u201cdoubriage\u201d one more time, I\u2019m gonna hit his car.<\/p>\n
30. On another note, I\u2019ve always questioned the origin of this word.<\/p>\n
31. Dou-bri-age.<\/p>\n
32. Apparently, it\u2019s a creative Lebanese translation of the French equivalent \u201ckit d\u2019embrayage.\u201d<\/p>\n
33. [Emphasize on creative]<\/p>\n
34. What am I even thinking\u2026<\/p>\n
35. Sorry to interrupt your linguistic reflection, brain, but I got a \u201cdoubriage\u201d to maneuver here.<\/p>\n
36. Why are complete strangers throwing state-the-obvious driving tips at me?<\/p>\n
37. You can\u2019t just stare at me like that.<\/p>\n
38. *parks correctly*<\/p>\n
39. I now pronounce myself Parking Queen.<\/p>\n
40. Wait I still got the dreaded back turn.<\/p>\n
41. \u201cSlow down!\u201d<\/p>\n
42. Oh well.<\/p>\n
43. Does my teacher always have to kill my vibe?<\/p>\n
44. On the bright side, I\u2019m done.<\/p>\n
45. What do you mean I have to wait one more hour for the jury to come?<\/p>\n
46. I should\u2019ve brought a friend for entertainment purposes.<\/p>\n
47. I\u2019m officially melting.<\/p>\n
48. Why are there too many parents in here?<\/p>\n
49. Wait why are my parents not among the parents?<\/p>\n
50. I feel abandoned, as in an intense mix of loneliness, homelessness and rejection. <\/p>\n
51. No one understands my pain.<\/p>\n
52. Jury is here!<\/p>\n
53. Wait why is the jury, like, one person?<\/p>\n
54. He looks friendly though. <\/p>\n
55. Imma pull off my best French accent.<\/p>\n
56. \u201cEuh, Bonjour Monsieur!\u201d<\/p>\n
57. Traffic Sign Challenge: check.<\/p>\n
58. What do you mean I have to wait another half-an-hour for my turn?<\/p>\n
59. *Gets into the car*<\/p>\n
60. \u201cCome forward.\u201d<\/p>\n
61. You don\u2019t say.<\/p>\n
62. [A friendly reminder that I\u2019m trying to fit a real-life vehicle into a small yellow rectangle while also struggling to achieve a delicate balance between my doubriage-related leg action and wheel-related hand action]<\/p>\n
63. Wait the jury is actually two people\u2026<\/p>\n
64. In other news, I somehow managed to park well enough.<\/p>\n
65. Wait did I just step on the yellow line on my way back?<\/p>\n
66. [Successive mini-deaths]<\/p>\n
67. Hey don\u2019t look at me like that.<\/p>\n
68. That was close\u2026<\/p>\n
69. But hey I made it.<\/p>\n
70. *friendzones \u201cdoubriage\u201d forever*<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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