{"id":38183,"date":"2016-03-19T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2016-03-19T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/38183\/how-to-meet-a-man-on-a-dating-site"},"modified":"2023-08-14T11:13:28","modified_gmt":"2023-08-14T11:13:28","slug":"how-to-meet-a-man-on-a-dating-site","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/en\/38183\/how-to-meet-a-man-on-a-dating-site\/","title":{"rendered":"How To Meet A Man On A Dating Site"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><big>Did you know that you can meet a man while you\u2019re on your couch chugging vodka and eating spaghetti? Just sign onto any dating site or hookup app. Here are some guidelines for talking to men on dating sites:<\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/38183.png\"><br \/>  (Image via <a href=\"https:\/\/www.tumblr.com\/search\/date\" target=\"_new\" rel=\"noopener\">Tumblr<\/a>)<\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/38183.png\" width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>I don\u2019t mean that they\u2019re whiny blondes, though some of them can be. I mean you need to talk to them not too little, not too much, but just the right amount. I have a dum-dum friend who has a really stupid rule: she waits 17 hours before replying to a text. Needless to say, she doesn\u2019t get laid very often, most probably because planning with her takes approximately three years due to her mandatory texting pauses. <b>Don\u2019t try to be calculating<\/b>, it&#8217;s fucking stupid. There is no magic number of hours to wait between responses that will land you a man, and playing emotional games with a cell phone is childish. <\/big> <\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/38183-1.png\" width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>Considering that it\u2019s 2016 and women are allowed to vote, you can also message your male-interest first! If you\u2019re interested in a man or his crotch area, go ahead and message. What\u2019s the worst that could happen? I mean, he could reject you the exact same way your father did when you were a teen and bring up those emotional scars you have since buried beneath plastic surgery and a low-grade pill addiction causing you to spiral downwards into the abyss of depression, but he probably will just say, &#8220;hi&#8221; back, and proceed to ask about your tits.<\/big> <\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/38183-2.png\" width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>If you\u2019re not remotely interested in this person, you probably shouldn\u2019t be messaging them at all. But <b>in addition to being interested, you should be interesting<\/b>. Ward off every instinct telling you to reply with shy one word answers. \u201cHi \u2013 good \u2013 yes \u2013 ok \u2013 hehe.\u201d Don\u2019t be such a boring asshole, ask questions, share some information about yourself. On the other hand, if they\u2019re boring you can stop talking to them. Very few men are good looking enough to get away with being boring \u2013 maybe only the Fassbenders and Cavills of the world can get away with this.<\/big> <\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/38183-3.png\" width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>Are you looking for a causal hookup or a long-term relationship? Try to read into what the person on the other side wants. If he blatantly stated that he is not looking for a relationship, don\u2019t try to turn your casual sex into an engagement \u2013 you\u2019re setting yourself up to fail.<\/big> <\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/38183-4.png\" width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>Putting aside the fact that some guys have the paranoia levels of a coked-up monkey, but the sense of humor of a much less interesting monkey, not all jokes go over well online. Until you\u2019ve established a rapport with someone, and you\u2019re sure they\u2019re going to understand the nuances of your jokes and comments, it\u2019s best to hold off on your seemingly psychotic jokes and one-liners.<\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/38183-5.png\" width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>This should be a no-brainer, but since so many people are also no-brainers: always make sure your first meeting is in public. Talking to somebody via text or on the phone can be misleading; people give off a very different vibe over texting than they do in person. You may be comfortable with them at a distance then freak out once they\u2019re within arm\u2019s (or penis\u2019) reach. <\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/38183-6.png\" width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>Because really, who gives a shit? Nobody.<\/big>      <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p><big>Did you know that you can meet a man while you\u2019re on your couch chugging vodka and eating spaghetti? Just sign onto any dating site or hookup app.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":0,"featured_media":419319,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ai_generated_summary":"","_preview_accessed":0,"_lftp_listicle_injection":"","footnotes":""},"tags":[],"media-embed-type":[],"class_list":["post-38183","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog"],"authorship":[102],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v28.0 (Yoast SEO v28.0) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>How To Meet A Man On A Dating Site<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Did you know that you can meet a man while you\u2019re on your couch chugging vodka and eating spaghetti? 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