{"id":43432,"date":"2017-03-18T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2017-03-18T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/43432\/the-struggles-of-a-lebanese-non-drinker"},"modified":"2017-03-18T00:00:00","modified_gmt":"2017-03-18T00:00:00","slug":"the-struggles-of-a-lebanese-non-drinker","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/en\/43432\/the-struggles-of-a-lebanese-non-drinker\/","title":{"rendered":"The Struggles of a Lebanese Non-Drinker"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><big>Did somebody say happy hour?<\/big> <\/p>\n<p>  <b><big><big>When you have to explain yourself.<\/b><\/big><\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/heidijoneschronicillness.files.wordpress.com\/2015\/09\/big-bang.gif\"width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>Let\u2019s face it. \u2018I don\u2019t drink\u2019 is not exactly your best punchline when your country has a total population of approximately 4.467 million self-proclaimed party animals. It\u2019s like you\u2019re constantly compelled to pepper your statement with \u2018sorry\u2019. You know, like, I don\u2019t drink, sorry for the inconvenience. Please accept my sincere apologies for my slightly abnormal liquid preferences. But it doesn\u2019t stop there, people will usually follow up with an unending thread of no-brainer questions. <i>Oh really? Do your parents not allow you?<\/i> Do your parents allow you to ask such inappropriate questions? <i>Have you had a traumatizing drunk incident?<\/i> What are you, my therapist? <i>Are you Mormon?<\/i> Euhh, no?<\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <b><big><big>When you\u2019ve mastered the noble art of sipping on nothing.<\/b><\/big><\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/2.bp.blogspot.com\/-hejv1sifIIo\/U1ucowOIx_I\/AAAAAAAAFec\/kzv-V2Lofx0\/s1600\/clueless.gif\"width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>Excuse me as I casually pretend to sip the night out of the random drink I just ordered while not actually drinking anything because conformity is an essential social function for the average human being I am. No, I don\u2019t feel bad for myself. Not at all.<\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <b><big><big>When you\u2019re the only sober friend.<\/b><\/big><\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/cdn2.teen.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/01\/week-in-review-emma-watson-jelena.gif\"width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>Why is everyone acting weird? Stop throwing the undisclosed contents of your heart out at me. Am I the only sane person here (yes, probably)? Why am I friends with you again? And you? Eww\u2026<\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <b><big><big>When you\u2019re totally illiterate when it comes to drink names.<\/b><\/big><\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/33.media.tumblr.com\/46297305fdc83acdd27c1a4f1be3eda6\/tumblr_mu2az8nrt71sn9k23o1_400.gif\"width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>Pardon the limited capacities of my brain but I genuinely can\u2019t seem to fit the full alcoholic beverages lexicon into my memory. Oh, and I still can\u2019t tell the difference between beer and vodka.<\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <b><big><big>When the bartender decides to adopt you.<\/b><\/big><\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/37.media.tumblr.com\/6a15fef967a16a84f52653e715f86e89\/tumblr_ms2bn1VYGk1qedb29o2_500.gif\"width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>This unfortunate scenario usually happens when your friends somehow choose to divulge your non-drinker status to the bartender, who will eventually sweet talk you into trying every single cocktail combination there is, hoping to make you fall in love with one.  Little do they know all their efforts are going to waste (well, maybe not entirely as it\u2019s usually one of your friends who will end up hooked on one of your cocktails)\u2026<\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <b><big><big>When your party animal friend attempts to convert you.<\/b><\/big><\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/img.memecdn.com\/trying-to-explain-anime-to-your-friend-who-hates-it_o_504693.gif\"width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>\u2018You need to go through the experience of being drunk, just for once, it\u2019s psychologically beneficial to experience new sensations.\u2019 Thank you for the valuable philosophical insight but I\u2019m happy the way I am.<\/big> <\/p>\n<p>  <b><big><big>When you feel awkward at parties.<\/b><\/big><\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/mashable.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/07\/scott-pilgrim-bored-party.gif\"width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>No drinks attached.<\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <b><big><big>When you try to fake interest in your friends\u2019 hangover stories.<\/b><\/big><\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com\/originals\/14\/31\/e3\/1431e31b730897f415553a9b18e251f3.gif\"width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>No matter how hard you try to relate to your friends\u2019 drunk chronicles, your misplaced nods and fake half-smiles are hardly ever able to suppress your overall \u2018meh\u2019 face. Oh, really? Heh. No way. Really? NO. What even? For real? *faints due to interjection overload*<\/big><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p><big>Did somebody say happy hour?<\/big> <\/p>\n<p>\n<b><big><big>When you have to explain yourself.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":0,"featured_media":416069,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpai_generated_summary":"","_preview_accessed":0,"_lftp_listicle_injection":"","footnotes":""},"tags":[],"media-embed-type":[],"class_list":["post-43432","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog"],"authorship":[68],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v28.5 (Yoast SEO v28.5) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>The Struggles of a Lebanese Non-Drinker<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Did somebody say happy hour? 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