{"id":43912,"date":"2015-10-23T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2015-10-23T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/43912\/the-struggles-of-being-friends-with-new-parents"},"modified":"2023-08-11T04:33:31","modified_gmt":"2023-08-11T04:33:31","slug":"the-struggles-of-being-friends-with-new-parents","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/en\/43912\/the-struggles-of-being-friends-with-new-parents\/","title":{"rendered":"The Struggles Of Being Friends With New Parents"},"content":{"rendered":"<big>Having a baby is life changing; those little bundles of joy will surely turn your whole world upside down. For one, becoming a parent is an exhausting full-time job, you learn to function on minimal sleeping hours and survive the deafening cries of your baby\u2019s inner monster. But you know what\u2019s even more difficult than becoming a parent? Being friends with one. While I do have mad respect for new moms and dads, being friends with someone who just had their first baby can have its struggles, and here they are:<\/big><br \/>  <br \/>  <b><big><big>1. Baby Talk<\/b><\/big><\/big><br \/>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/media.giphy.com\/media\/Fz2kYpN3AkU8M\/giphy.gif\"width=\"100%\"><br \/>  <br \/>  <big>While I am guilty of being one of those people who uses baby gibberish to communicate with babies; I usually turn that switch off when going back to real life on Earth. On the other hand, new parents apparently do not have that switch. Your friend will almost exclusively use baby talk with their partner and everyone else. The worst part is that you\u2019ll eventually adopt their horrible habit! \u201cYes I wanna nomnom but first I gotta peepee.\u201d<\/big><br \/>  <br \/>  <br \/>  <br \/>  <b><big><big>2. Poop<\/b><\/big><\/big><br \/>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/media.giphy.com\/media\/KMA5minlWfkCQ\/giphy.gif\"width=\"100%\"><br \/>  <br \/>  <big>Listen, I love your baby. Seriously, I\u2019d do anything for that little angel, but sending me poop pics and asking me about what I think of the color\u2026that\u2019s where I draw the line. Seriously, do you really have to describe your baby\u2019s poop right when I\u2019m taking my first bite of the burger?! Also: I\u2019m just a pre-med student, we haven\u2019t gotten to baby poop yet.<\/big><br \/>  <br \/>  <br \/>  <b><big><big>3. Baby-Proofing<\/b><\/big><\/big> <br \/>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/43912-1.png\" width=\"100%\"><br \/>  <br \/>  <big>You\u2019re casually chilling at their place, you get up to grab yourself a drink\u2026you encounter this alien Warcraft thingy on their fridge; you try to open it, nothing happens. That little bitch is mocking you now, staring at you. So you give up and head to the bathroom instead and surprise: another one has its grip over the toilet seat\u2026this is how I die, dehydrated and in a puddle of my own pee.<\/big><br \/>  <br \/>  <br \/>  <br \/>  <b><big><big>4. Bad Guy<\/b><\/big><\/big><br \/>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/media.giphy.com\/media\/40m8VCOyPsvF6\/giphy.gif\"width=\"100%\"><br \/>  <br \/>  <big>When the baby starts growing up and all its shenanigans begin, your friend will be looking for ways to discipline their kid. That will most definitely involve you! \u201cStop yelling or this man will eat you\u201d\u2026wha\u2026what! Come again? I do not eat children\u2026or any human being for what it\u2019s worth. What am I? Hannibal? You will also be the guy who kidnaps kids, who puts them in baby jail (yes that will be a thing,) and who eats their candy. Say goodbye to any chance of being on good terms with that kid, he will probably end up seeking help later on in his life because of you. (Sorry kid, it\u2019s not up to me.)<\/big><br \/>  <br \/>  <br \/>  <b><big><big>5. Food Testing<\/b><\/big><\/big><br \/>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/media.giphy.com\/media\/G7NFq0HNOQN8I\/giphy.gif\"width=\"100%\"><br \/>  <br \/>  <big>If you see your friend walking towards you with a jar of slimy goo and a spoon\u2026RUN. They\u2019ll want to ask you to taste their baby\u2019s food; if you do taste it, it\u2019ll make you question whether they actually like their kids or not. Bottom line is, unless you\u2019re an astronaut, keep away from paste food.<\/big><br \/>  <br \/>  <br \/>  <b><big><big>6. Pictures Galore<\/b><\/big><\/big><br \/>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/43912-250x141.png\" width=\"100%\"><br \/>  <br \/>  <big>I understand it\u2019s your first baby, everything is new and exciting; but was it really necessary that I wake up at 3:00 am to see a picture of your baby sucking his toes (as adorable as that is.) And what happened to your Facebook account? It looks like it was invaded by an army of babies, I\u2019m struggling to remember what you look like!<\/big> <br \/>  <br \/>  <br \/>  <i>Just kidding, I care about your baby\u2026 a lot. Now please put that knife down and let\u2019s discuss your baby\u2019s beauty somewhere with witnesses around\u2026<\/i>    <figure class=\"wp-block-gallery has-nested-images columns-default is-cropped wp-block-gallery-1 is-layout-flex wp-block-gallery-is-layout-flex\"><figure class=\"wp-block-image size-large\" ><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"250\" height=\"141\" data-id=\"415765\" src=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/43912-250x141.png\" alt=\"\" class=\"wp-image-415765\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/43912-250x141.png 250w, https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/43912.png 500w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 250px) 100vw, 250px\" \/><\/figure><\/figure>    ","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p><big>Having a baby is life changing; those little bundles of joy will surely turn your whole world upside down.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":0,"featured_media":415767,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wpai_generated_summary":"","_preview_accessed":0,"_lftp_listicle_injection":"","footnotes":""},"tags":[],"media-embed-type":[],"class_list":["post-43912","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-blog"],"authorship":[46],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v28.5 (Yoast SEO v28.5) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>The Struggles Of Being Friends With New Parents<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Having a baby is life changing; 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