{"id":49029,"date":"2016-09-28T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2016-09-28T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/49029\/6-horrible-tips-for-lebanese-restaurant-etiquette"},"modified":"2023-08-14T11:45:05","modified_gmt":"2023-08-14T11:45:05","slug":"6-horrible-tips-for-lebanese-restaurant-etiquette","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/en\/49029\/6-horrible-tips-for-lebanese-restaurant-etiquette\/","title":{"rendered":"6 (Horrible) Tips For Lebanese Restaurant Etiquette"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><big>Dining out can be great! And it can be horrible &#8211; read on.<\/big><\/p>\n<p>  Note for the humorless: these are <i>jokes<\/i>. <\/p>\n<p>  <B><big><big>1. Make sure your kids run laps around the restaurant.<\/b><\/big><\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/49029.png\" width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>I personally like my scallops and wine with a side of screaming child, so please make sure your toddler sprints around and taps me on the shoulder SEVERAL times during my meal. Also feel free to ignore your kids running into waiters, that is so not your problem.<\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <B><big><big>2. Display your affection very publicly.<\/big><\/big><\/b><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/blog.relationshipsurgery.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/04\/Sexxx.gif\"width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>Nothing makes sushi more delicious than watching a couple finger bang each other at the next table. Threesome?<\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <B><big><big>3. Laugh like a hyena.<\/b><\/big><\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/secure.static.tumblr.com\/0ba1cd254e0036fd434b6601362ff7be\/tskjndn\/dq5o4v114\/tumblr_static_nei29pxnuyo0c448w8c48cgg_640_v2.gif\"width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>Makes your fellow diner&#8217;s experience more memorable by hooting and screaming all fucking night. The restaurant is your toilet, so feel free to LOL away.<\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <B><big><big>4. Shun any and all common decency towards the waitstaff.<\/b><\/big><\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/www.beirut.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/04\/49029-1.png\" width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>The waiters are your personal property on which you can shit. Order them around, snap your fingers at them, and blame them for things that go wrong. After all, if you say \u2018please\u2019 or \u2018thank you\u2019 &#8211; you might lose a limb or something!<\/big>\u2028<\/p>\n<p>  <B><big><big>5. Sit around for hours after your meal ends.<\/b><\/big><\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/m.popkey.co\/d33180\/8yXp6.gif\"width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <Big>It&#8217;s Friday night, you\u2019re at a crowded restaurant, you finished your meal an hour ago, and there are dozens waiting to be seated. None of that is your problem! You just sit around and smoke your cigar, you human piranha.<\/big><\/p>\n<p>  <B><big><big>6. Never tip.<\/big><\/big><\/b><\/p>\n<p>  <img decoding=\"async\" src=\"https:\/\/az616578.vo.msecnd.net\/files\/2016\/01\/03\/635874607230455001753985408_giphy.gif\"width=\"100%\"><\/p>\n<p>  <big>Refer to point #4.<\/big>    <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p><big>Dining out can be great! And it can be horrible &#8211; read on.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":0,"featured_media":411687,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_preview_accessed":0,"footnotes":""},"tags":[],"media-embed-type":[],"class_list":["post-49029","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-listomania"],"authorship":[102],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v27.3 (Yoast SEO v27.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-premium-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>6 (Horrible) Tips For Lebanese Restaurant Etiquette<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Dining out can be great! 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