Listomania
Clauda Tanios

Ten Things All Lebanese University Students Know To Be True

So you want to put yourself through a grueling gauntlet of higher education? Welcome to Lebanese University.

1. Only the smartest, most hardworking students will survive.

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Only people who’s sole purpose in life is to study will pass classes at LU. The professors are tough, so you’ve got to be even tougher to succeed.

2. Passing the entrance exam is a lifetime achievement.

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Passing the entrance exam is a serious accomplishment. It’s actually better than passing the ‘terminale’ official exams. Cue the fireworks, and pass out the be2lewa; this is cause for a celebration.

3. Finding the right classroom is an adventure.

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In some faculties, students actually have to search for an empty classroom to conduct sessions with the professor. The schedule only mentions periods, so the students have to find a classroom and inform the professor of where it’s happening. One day he’ll teach on the first floor – room 106, and the next day it’s on the 3rd floor – room 315. Needless to say, every day is an adventure.

4. We want and don’t want student elections.

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We envy the fuss other universities have over student elections. Administration at LU cancelled elections in 2008 after an incident involving a knife in the Faculty of Science. Most LU students now want the elections back, while some students are glad they’re gone out of fear of political disputes and similar incidents. It’s a mixed bag of tricks you see.

5. The libraries are haunted.

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They’re huge, and hold vast collections of books and encyclopedias, but there’s something undeniably spooky about these literary haunts.

6. Student ID cards take forever to be distributed.

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Every year I wait for my ID card, and every year around Christmas I actually get it.

7. Surprise! Your exams are postponed.

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The element of surprise is always there at Lebanese University. You wake up early after studying all night for your exam, and you go anxiously to take it, only to find out that, SURPRISE, it’s not happening today.

8. Breaks?! We don’t have those.

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While students at private universities enjoy winter break, spring break, or a break after finals week, LU students finish exams on Friday and return for the start of the second semester on… wait for it… MONDAY! Yes, we only rest for a weekend after finals.

9. Are the results in yet?!

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If you took your finals in late February, prepare to get the results no earlier than mid-April. Gee thanks!

10. The relief of graduating.

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Pat yourself on the back. You’re a survivor, goddammit.