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Christina Tkacik 13 May 2015

I’m So Old, Mom Jeans is a Thing Now

Yesterday it was Dad Bod, today it’s Mom Jeans. What would Freud have to say?

I went to H&M and American Eagle this weekend and both of them were selling jeans labeled, “Mom Jeans.”

I could hardly believe my eyes. I remember a time, long, long ago, when mom jeans were subject to such intense ridicule that Tina Fey and Amy Poehler made a skit about them on SNL.

The year was 2003. The joke was funny at the time – in fact, at the time, it was hilarious – because it was literally laughable that anyone would buy a pair of “Mom Jeans.” Low-waisted jeans were in. Jeans were so low-waisted that you needed to make sure the top of your bush was shaved before you went out in public. Every time you bent forward, someone made a plumber joke. The world was different then. There was no Facebook – or no one used it anyway. They used Friendster. Tara Reid was a legitimately popular actress. I’m dating myself terribly, aren’t I?

(Image via lbstatic.nu)

The point is, children, once upon a time you wouldn’t be caught dead in anything closely resembling Mom Jeans because people would make fun of you. And now it’s all the rage. It shows that fashion is a truly fickle beast. The clothes you abhor today may tomorrow be the height of good taste. There is a cautionary tale for us all in this. What appears to be hip today, could in just a few years time make you look like an asshole. Conversely, what makes you look like a fool today – tomorrow may in fact be cool. This rule applies to many others aspects of life and areas of human expression. As Dorothy Parker once said of her own writing, “Let’s face it, honey, my verse is terribly dated—as anything once fashionable is dreadful now.”

A few years ago I was visiting friends in New York City. I’d just had a breakup from a long-term relationship and was going through a bit of a manic period. Before heading out for the night, I decided to wear a man’s silk pajama top as a jacket. I felt a little like a crazy person, but you can get away with this kind of thing when you’re in New York. And now, H&M is selling a blazer styled to look like a pajama top at H&M. So you see, I was ahead of my time.

Now concerning the Mom Jeans phenomenon, you, as wearers of jeans have to make some decisions for yourself. Are mom jeans for you? Like all things in life it has some pros and it has some cons. For one, if you have a slim waist, it may be quite flattering. However, if you have a bladder infection, it may exacerbate the situation and make you feel like you are dying. I suggest putting on some loose-fitting leggings and drinking some cranberry juice instead.

“With fashion, one day you are in, and the next you are out.” That’s what Heidi Klum always says on a show called Project Runway. It aired a long, long, time ago…