Schedules are updated every Thursday.
We all like to think we’re unique in our own way. But there are quite a few similarities that join together Lebanese people to all the varied people of this world. We won’t be exploring those. Instead, we’re gonna take the most common generic (and midly offensive?) foreign stereotypes (Italian = I cook da pasta) and match them to a Lebanese figure that has the same vibe. Enjoy!
1. Carlos Ghosn as Obsessive German Efficiency
With a dark side…
2. Darine Hamze as French Cigarette-Diet Cultural Connoisseur
4. Emile Lahoud as Angry Italian Cook
I cooka da pasta! I makea the president! I am the Italian of the Lebanese people!
5. Adel Karam as Depressed Evil Nordic Man
He has a type of sadness you only see in the eyes of Nordic people.
6. Wiam Wahhab as Bankrupt British Aristocrat
Wiam Wahhab truly encapsulates a vision of post-feudal Britain, why does he exist? Why do we still listen to him? Just because he has some land and following? At the end of the day, it’s all bluster with nothing behind it.
7. Elsy Ferneini as Feisty Mexican Grandma
Do not get on her wrong side, or else, she is truly the Sofia Vergara of Lebanese people.
8. Myriam Nour as Spiritual Chinese Aunt
9. Michel Elias El Murr as Decedent 1% Swiss Alps Vacationer
Sometimes I feel bad for ragging on this man this much, but guess what he’s a fucking member of parliament, so I’m not going to stop.
10. Yazbek Wehbe as Second Generation Korean Small Business Owner
He would run a mini market like it’s the navy.
11. Georges Khabbaz as Iraqi Baathist General
Truly a great champion of the Lebanese people, and potentially a war criminal, sorry I don’t make the rules.