Schedules are updated every Thursday.

Bassel Obeid 21 Feb 2023

18 Things You Definitely Had To Do If You Were Raised By Lebanese Parents

Being the child to Lebanese parents is a collective experience. For its very niche audience, we compiled a list of things you definitely had to do if your parents were Lebanese.

1. Hide the fact that you already ate when your mom spent the entire day making mloukhiye

2. Expertly reply to the waynak/ik text at it’s 11pm and you were supposed to be home 4 hours ago

3. Take a jacket with you everywhere, no matter the season

4. Get lectured about smoking while one (or both) of your parents was smoking

5. Forget everything you know about modern medicine because yansoun can cure any rare disease

6. Walk on mopped floors like it’s full of landmines

7. Apply Fucidin on everything because it is definitely an all-purpose drug

8. Wake up early on days off to visit teta and jeddo during eid

9. Call your relatives to say thank you because they gifted you something (even if you never received it)

10. Say no to dyafe at least 5 times before reluctantly accepting

11. Lie in bed all day ONLY if your fever exceeds 40-degrees

12. Wear socks at home at all times

13. Forcibly 3ayid all your relatives on the phone when it’s eid because your parents told you to

14. Refrain from saying “ma khassak” to your dad

15. Take ekhtak/khayyak with you whenever you want to go out

16. Claim the title of the family’s “tech genius/future computer engineer” because you just restarted your mom’s phone for it to stop lagging

17. Let out your road rage when a driver honks at your mom while she’s driving

18. Answer the “lesh, lawen, ma3 meen, ayya se3a reje3/rej3a, ba3ref ahlon?” questions before every outing