12 Things You Can Never Predict In Lebanon

If there’s one thing Lebanon can claim to be the best at, it’s not showing you its next move. A volatile and unpredictable country on the best of days, there are some things which you can definitely never predict in Lebanon. Here are 12 things you will never be able to get right. 1. Your bank’s new random policy of the day If you withdraw any money between 9:53 AM and 11:21 AM, an extra 15% morning fee is charged. 2. Traffic Which road is closed? Who’s double parked where? There’s just traffic for no reason? 3. The temperature Jacket and a t-shirt, safe bet. 4. The stupid controversy of the week Egyptian balloons are invading the Litani river! 5. The exchange rate Who is deciding these things, please, let’s pretend there’s any rational dynamics behind it. 6. How much anything costs There’s only one guarantee, it must always go up. 7. How disastrous your first date experiences can be Our standards were low, but holy fuck 8. Who you’ll run into in the street at any given moment Your ex, your kindergarten teacher, and your arch-nemesis, all at the same time. Never let your guard down on any leisurely stroll 9. What language the next word will be Arabic, English, French, or an unholy mixture of all three. 10. The next cringe Change MP move Although I’m not sure if this one can be topped. 11. This point I’m sure you didn’t predict the next point on this list to be just called this point, did you? 12. The next president There’s only like 3 names in the bag, but no one knows anything. 1