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Despite the many divisions that supposedly separate the Lebanese population, there are a few universal moments that unite us all, here are 13 of them.
1. Pa2 pa2 pa2
On any occasion.
2. Airplane clapping
When that plane lands, all our differences subside. Cringe unity.
3. Three bank accounts you can’t access
Disney keeps wondering why everyone in Lebanon is googling Frozen
4. Dealing with Lebanese bureaucracy
Fout yameen ba3den shmel w rou7 la edem w d3as da3esten la warra w not jowet el hoop
5. Fi parking spot!
A light shines down from the heavens, an angel appears over your head, the most serene music plays, congrats, you are Lebanese.
6. Missed Call: Mom
7. Teta gossip
It hits different when you get that tea about your fifteenth cousin who you’ve never met and is potentially either b Germany aw Hollanda
8. Taxi driver traffic
Being stuck behind a service desperately looking for customers is the ultimate Lebanese experience.
9. Lamma 7ada yeksor 3lek
And you follow them for 5 blocs and then you pull a gun out and you kill them, that’s the true essence of Lebanese unity.
10. Airport goodbyes
When the family goes out to the mall at the end of the month.
12. Neighborhood fights
I love it when my 5th floor neighbor and the man from the shop across the street get into a huge brawl over the parking in front of the khodarje.
13. Sectarian jokes
Although some believe that we should do this less, it is truly the highest stage of comedy when we repeat the same 15 stereotypes every day. If you want a peak here are 20 Lebanese jokes we should retire but are still funny.